Warning From The Author: Under 18 Years Old Must Not Read!

You have already finished Cultural Anthropology exam. And it was bad! Don't ASK... Now here come. Think it over. Start from the top. You have time. Okay.
The Top.
Imagine back to the 25th of December 4:30 at the evening:
You drive off the main street and you reach Snow White's house. A Vigo blocks your way. It means you have to walk up the sidewalk. So you shut off the engine and look at the house. And you already hear m
usic is blasting loudly far from distance. The front door is vibrating. Then out of nowhere, Snow white comes to greet you. She practically pushes you inside. She tells you, she's been waiting restlessly for ages. But as you are scanning the place.
You ask: " Are you having a party?" Snow white says: "It's just a girl gathering!" You say: "How come! You didn't tell me." Snow white: "I wanted to surprise YOU! Surprise?" You answer her with a titter. Then you make mental note right away. Well, girls party means NO Gentle
men Allowed!
---
Snow white grabs your hand and leads you to the living room, which fills with a big bunch of cute girls. She introduces you to them, and it's like the Hottie meet the nottie. Omg! Each of them is so gorgeous. They wear short pants, skinny jeans, mini skirts. Their bags are Dolce&Gabbana, Gucci, and Louis Vuitton [Even if they're fake! Ha..]. And what you are wearing is, a skinny jeans, a pink tank top and a white stripped shirt! No makeup. And they look as if they all work for ELLE magazine. You see Snow white is smiling her best smile now, and she looks as cute as usual. But you are distracted because somebody's shoving a bottle of Spy at you. And you take it only because you don't want it to drop onto the living room floor.
They have no IDEA that you are a number ONE teetotaler! Snow white seems to read your mind, she knew it. She says to you: "That's alright, honey! I also have some cokes, and I did order a pizza without mushroom just for you! Come on, it's over there."
You smile and let a sigh of relief. You reckon to when you first told Snow white that you don't drink. She looked at you like you were an alien from outer space. She asked why and you said: "It's just the way I am!" and she lets you be. You choose not to drink, not even a single sip! That's all.
----
Snow white shows you the food table, and you don't want to make a beast of yourself, but all these pizzas are now leftover for you. And you're a bit hungry by then. So you eat them and the pizza without mushroom is great anyway.
----
And just so, Snow white is gone, she's not in the place where you last saw her. However, it's not easy to actually see anyone specifically. Because it's pretty dark, yet beamy in the room and everyone's moving around, dancing to the music, and which is so loud to the ears. Because no boys are there, and they JACK UP THE MUSIC to ears-splitting level! You're afraid the neighbors might call the police. But no! This is Cambodia, not America, that means it's okay to be loud! Though, the noises make it hard enough to hear you speak. Let alone hear yourself think!
----
Some girls have obviously been on the bottles, they teeter around. Others start eating chips and pretzels and drinking sparkling wines and beers. You definitely turn green when you see those empty bottles cluttering on the floor. Thank kindness, this is a real grown-ups party. So No Underage Girls Allowed.
---
Then you spot Snow white, she isn't tipsy. She comes up to you and asks you to dance with her. You shake your head, but she insists. She pulls you along to the middle of the living room. Finally, we're dancing and laughing and all the girls join us, showing off their hottest dance moves. Guys would just die to see this [But no such luck!]. You dance a couple of Gwen Stefani's hits, and then you sit down watch those hot chicks. You drink coke and eat pretzels on the couch.
---
And again, out of the corner, Snow white puts an arm around your shoulders and gives you a Christmas gift. It makes you feel so flabbergasted! You pretend to say you don't have anything for her. But she says she doesn't want anything! And you grin at her so long, until she asks "What?" then you hand her a gift. When she sees it, she giggles away and holds your shoulders closely that our heads meet. You suppose, Snow white loves the scarf, because she dances wearing it, and it looks pretty cool on her!
---
When she's off to dance with her friends, you stay still on the couch watching blinklessly, coz these babes seem so attractive and fun to watch. And before you knew it, a couple of pretty girls out there are making out! You mean really MAKE OUT! Well, who can withstand this, when the atmosphere is so convenient that way. And you just sit there watching ladies lipslock scene. Then a thought comes into your mind unconditional acceptance! So you leave them alone. Suddenly, a girl shows up and slams herself right next to you, a bottle of beer's in her hand, and she just stares at everybody with this weird smile. She looks so off the color, so you kneel down to talk to her. You ask if she's okay, and she keeps saying in her slurring words, "Fine, fine, don't worry, I'm not drunk... I only... wanna—├Âuk!!!"
Just like that in the middle of her sentence, she THROWS UP! And where does she throw up?...YOU! You're frozen with shock. Your inner voice screams: "Oh my god! That's my BEST jeans!" some girls holler, others laugh in amuse, and the rest still dance crazily. Only Snow white has a brain to seize a roll of toilet paper to clean up for you and pulls you to your feet, asking if you want to get change or anything. You reassure her :"That's nothing, I'm okay! Don't worry, just a little wet stuff. I can clean it myself!"
---
Then you head out to the bathroom, rinse it off. And what's next? Another chick rushes into the bathroom while you're still using it. She too NEEDS to Throw Up! You roll your eyes. Girls are so disgusting! But you still have a nerve to help her, rubbing the back gently, and you turn on and off the water knob for her. After that, you start to recognize that girl, she's the one, who has just tongue-wrestled with her girlfriend. And somehow, she's very beautiful in a girly dress and well, so is her girlfriend.
---
A moment later, you help her walk out of the bathroom, she's so imbalanced and is in bad shape. You put her arm on your shoulders and you try so hard to keep walking in straight way. The air is thick with heavily smell of alcohol and you start to smell as if you've been drinking too. Suddenly, the girl turns to face you, you can see her makeup-eyes look red. And finally, she blurts out unconsciously: " I love you so much, Oun-Za!"
Eyes wide open. You exclaim: "Augn Nos!"
Uh-oh! You smell trouble ahead.
She's mistaken you with her girlfriend!!!
Big mistake!
Then she holds you tightly in her arms like she's hugging a stuffed animal! Half of you want to scream for help, but half don't want to embarrass her. So you just keep shouting to her: "Hey, Hey! It's me! It's me!". You struggle to tug her arms off of your neck and torso. Just in your time of need, Snow white happens to be there on time.
You gesture to her I-don't-know-what's happening-but-just-help-me-out!
My hero to the rescue!
Snow white jumps on us and she separates the drunken girl away from you. She talks to her in a very firm voice, " You should go home, now you're so drunk!" and then calls someone out to take her back to the living room.
---
You're happy to escape with your life. Phew! Couldn't believe things like that ever happen to you.
Snow white finally asks: " Are you alright?"
You: "I'm alright, don't worry. She didn't hurt me and she doesn't mean it anyway. I guess, she just drank a little TOO MUCH!" You laugh nervously at your own words.
It feels so dorky when Snow white isn't amused, and she says: "I know what's going on with her, and now she's lost her mind. I'll talk to her one day. I'm so sorry for what happened."
You say: "No, it's not your fault. Really. But now, I better get going, it's time I must go home."
She eyes you for a minute and then asks: "No hard feeling?"
You say: "Of course NOT! No hard feeling, I swear! Don't worry too much."
End of the conversation.
---
After that, Snow white walks you to the car. She thanks you for coming, and that she also loves the gift you brought for her. We say good night. Then you're OUT of there!
---
As you're driving home, another crazy Ping Pong game playing itself in your head. You have to concentrate like mad just to drive, and you go really slowly. When you get home, you expect mom to tell you off for being late at night, instead she calls out to you: "Sweetie! Is it the Opera you've been waiting to see? It's now on!"
Alright, it takes one amazing play to ease your mind, and even dad is home, he still sends mom a message saying "I wish you Happy Merry Christmas and Happy New Year! My love." Mom is so shy, and she keeps giggling. And Dad's so cool! That brings you a smile for the rest of the evening. And then everything else isn't matter anymore. It's the most memorable Christmas day, you guess! Only you can't figure out what it means.
---
The End.
PS: My apology for inappropriated writing and personal views of you-know-what-happened. New secret, new problem. Sometimes writing about them, helps. Anyway, thanks for reading.
Warning From The Author: Under 18 Years Old Must Not Read! Warning From The Author: Under 18 Years Old Must Not Read! Reviewed by Sovathary Bon on Monday, December 29, 2008 Rating: 5

12 comments:

  1. I'm just speechless... I really don't know what to say in here. Ummm But hey, I forgot to say Happy Merry Christmas to you!!! Heya! Damnn me!

    Btw, Happy Merry Belated-Christmas! teehee

    ReplyDelete
  2. Well, so do I! It's not that something like this happens everyday. But I just know that our society is constantly changing. Okay. Let them be! But thank you. I also forgot to say it to you. Mind me not! Happy Merry Christmas!

    ReplyDelete
  3. People keep changing. Esp, GIRSL!
    I was thinking at the moment if you are one of a little-bit-conservative-girl or a traditional one out there! hehehe
    I would love to be a conventional one! :D

    I was shocked when those hotties threw up on you... Wow, they drink till drop!

    ReplyDelete
  4. Okay, start another one this time.
    I'm sort of not getting the point, what happens if I'm one of the little-conservation girl or traditional one out there? Well, I think I'm quite inward or like to keep myself to myself. And my mind works non-stop, so it's kindda crazy sometimes. Anyway, I like people, bcoz they seem funny. But it's okay for a few throw-ups that night, don't worry! And yeah, I was stunned when those girls gave me BIG throw-ups or big hug! In fact, I shouldn't have written it down, because it spoils the souls of youngsters.
    Btw, I wish u have a happy count down day tomorrow. Happy New Year 2009... [And Hello Oldness!] Hehehe!

    ReplyDelete
  5. You friend won't be here to see what you write right?? But I think she won't mind and might get to understand more about you. She must be someone who see the best and worst of you rite?

    YES! I'm gonna have a happy countdown night! and so do you. All the best to you! Happy New Year 2009! I think I'll see you next year!!! lolzz

    ReplyDelete
  6. There are only the worst she would see in me. Just kidding, I don't even tell a soul about it, even my best friend. I think that's how I hide my opinions from them, just so they still see me as a silly-go-happy little girl. I don't want those who love me, worry about me. But I don't mean to be pretentious, it's just sometimes, no news is a good news!
    Thanks for being you, I feel I have a good friend as a present for this New Year. Wish you healthy...with love.

    ReplyDelete
  7. So you have beed hidden your best. Pretentious in good ways does no matter.

    Hehehe. I'm too healthy srab hay! lolzz wish me more healthy meant that I'm gonna gain more weight! lolzzzzz I don't want that Ms. silly-go-happy little girl! I wish to be unhealthy so i can reduce some weight! lolz

    ReplyDelete
  8. hmmmmm...mer tov me derng sth klas klas hayzzz...doch read tov mean vibe jeng tha sth is inside na...derng me think tov rite or wrong te tae jess tae mean idea klas klas dae....

    Salanh monus manaek pibak nas man te? Jos ber salanh hay min prab , pibak bonna?
    Jos ber jong prab hay, neyay min jenh nos mech venh?

    nak mota sak....:s sigh!

    ReplyDelete
  9. Satuub Satuub! That's how we learn to live a life. But It's so funny to read this from u. oy jong vong veng just to pronounce in Khmer.
    heheheh...Okay, now you know!

    ReplyDelete
  10. lolzz...see i can be a fortunate teller (not in Wat Phnom) preferably Spark or Rock or Others...lolzz...

    Hey you know, it's so hard of you is it? lolzzz hey when will clean out ya closet like Mista Eminem heh? lolzz.. i have cleaned already, so come out lolzzz...(obviously)

    I am joking..just to have sth to laugh here.. hey when do you plan to teach me your writing heh? :s Jet akrok man hay !!

    ReplyDelete
  11. Oh, are u going to clean my closet for free? hehehe I would love to have u do it every week. Lol...

    It's nothing hard for me, I see a lot of best and worst things than u think I do. So I get used to it!

    Well, wanna learn how to write? Get ur material at hand, then just write!

    And tell me if u know how to write better besides doing that.

    ReplyDelete
  12. That's perfect writing regardless the grammar mistakes.

    It has the happy ending at last. I'm really sorry that you didn't have a chance to taste her soft tenderly sexy mouth and lively tongue even though you were so close to that opportunity. I'm sorry about that.

    Don't be worry. You'll get another chance next time, and I hope you won't miss it. Trust me, Keep trying will get what you want, Ma man.

    ReplyDelete

Let's be friends...i don't bite..

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